Monday, March 8, 2010

67. Through a glass darkly


I cannot even remember what I saw in her to begin with. I guess there must have been something. It is all so long ago now. Has she changed, or is it me?

Sorry, love. What did you say?
I’m not really all that hungry. Maybe, just that Spanish omelette, and somewhere, I noticed a Wolf Blass Coonawarra blend.

Am I bored, or am I boring? She seems to be enjoying all this. God, I am so depressed. I know Ian seems to think that is a cop-out, blaming everything on being depressed. How can I want out – it’s been over fifty years? Where would I go? How would I untangle it all? Would she mind? Would she even notice? Hah! There’s the rub!

Sorry, love. What? Did I even see that film? Yeah, yeah – I liked Cary Grant. I just cannot recall that particular film.

Anywhere but here ...

4 comments:

Joan Elizabeth said...

oooh that is a painful one ... imagine being his wife.

When I saw the title I was intrigued ... it is a quote from 1 Corinithians 13 in KJV. It says "now we see through a glass darkly, but then face to face."

He's sitting face to face now but I wonder just what he would face if he did decide to fly away .. a real wakeup call I'd reckon.

Julie said...

Yes, I knew it was a biblical reference. Yet when I googled it, I found it has been used widely through the years, and mainly to signify people going through transition.

I find that people in this age group, ten years older than me, are not as adept at discussing their relationship openly and issues fester and take on a life of their own. Once this happens, flight is often the only apparent option.

Joan Elizabeth said...

I've been thinking about this since and wondered what the woman might be thinking. So many women who have been homemakers all their married life find their lives horribly disrupted by having a man under their feet ... retirment can be a big shock for some.

Julie said...

I know that from experience, not because he retired but because a partnership folded and he proceeded to work from home.